trying to take it all in.

Today is a really hard day. to say the least. It's a day where nothing and no one can make you feel better (well at least it feels that way, it's not always the truth) I just have a lot that's screwed up in my mind, my family, and my boundaries. All these things decided to come to the front of the line today. Needless to say, but I was very much unprepared for all of this. Now I just feel icky. I feel like I have a rain cloud over my head.. you know like in the cartoons and comics? It is going to be a long journey to take control over these things and really hatch them our with God. Knowing that I can turn to the Lord with all this mess is what's keeping me from completely breaking down today. I know that I have God to thank for everything that I have in my life and that I can trust him. It's really really hard, but I do, because I know that the Lord with never ever leave me or forsake me. I love that. family, friends, coworkers,your cat or dog and whoever else can be dishonest and hurt you but the Lord is consistent.... gosh I need consistency.